Those who live in Paris, Bordeaux, Lyon or even Marseille know it: meeting someone in town is an unnamed hassle. The temptation on every street corner seems to transform exclusivity into a Grail almost impossible to reach, and sentimental reciprocity in the accomplishment of size. We tell you how to find love in the city, despite the obstacles.
After eight years of living in several international megalopolises, the observation appeared to me as an obviousness which will not be surprising for my fellow men: looking for love in a big city, that sucks. And for several reasons.
Already, the number of women in search of love is higher there than among men. We end up with the extraordinary competition; we are thus a good number of straight women to set their sights on the same guy, who often knows him very well that a good number of straight women will set their sights on his person. Rather unbalanced as the start of a relationship.
There is clearly no equality, and one has the impression of going to a job interview as soon as one has a date. As if we had to prove that we deserve the interest of our interlocutor, even our “place” in his life. In addition, the temptation is present on every street corner.
When we meet someone, before flirting turns into an exclusive relationship – and here again, the steps are codified as possible – there is always a risk very present in our head so that the object of our desires does not come across a girl who he likes more. And it’s a blow to our self-confidence.
In short, the whole process is exhausting.
Fortunately for our assumed city life, there are nonetheless behaviors to adopt so as not to suffer from the situation – and come out a winner.
1- Trying apps as much as real life
We cannot recommend one meeting method to you over another, we have a good deal of negative examples as positive in both cases. What we can warmly advise you, however, is not to be afraid to make new experiences. At worst, you will come back a little disappointed, at best, you will have got your hands on someone nice.
Dare to have a drink alone at your neighborhood bar – at the counter, if the prospect of a table for two scares you. Enroll in evening classes, workshops in a field that interests you particularly to increase your chances of meeting someone who shares your passions. Finally, drag yourself to this friend’s birthday that you almost canceled 10 times to stay in your bed: the soul mate may also be on the guest list.
The goal is to multiply the opportunities, without waiting for a conclusive meeting. By broadening your horizons, and by taking advantage of the event potential that big cities have to offer, you will certainly succeed in meeting someone who is worth it.
2- Trust your instinct
If this can be valid in all regions of France, listening to what one’s sixth sense is trying to communicate to us about the situation remains all the more essential when we enter the game of urban celibacy. We don’t know anything about him (not even friends in common to give us a taste of what awaits us), so we observe before acting.
Does he look honest? Is it pleasant with the servers · its restaurant? Does he really listen to what you say? If there is any doubt and your gut manifests as a red alert, stay alert. If, on the contrary, everything seems rather healthy and serene, relax and enjoy the adventure.
Generally, the warning signs that the other deserves neither the time nor the importance that is given to him are quick to appear. And in most cases, once the story is finished in pudding water, we know full well that we could have seen it coming if we had not veiled our faces.
3- Avoid getting carried away
OK, easier said than done. But with all the reasons mentioned above which explain why finding love in the city seems more complicated than elsewhere, it is better to take it easy.
Admittedly, it looks interesting and looks like a more accessible but equally attractive version of Louis Garrel. Certainly, he ticks off hands down the two boxes of what you are looking for in a guy (humor and an unbridled passion for Saint-Nectaire). But watch out for the sleeping water.
You are not told to be wary of everything, on the contrary, but rather to allow time for time, as Didier Barbelivien sang. See where it all leads you, learn to discover it and above all answer this question honestly: do I really like it?
You too could meet better around the corner, after all.
4- Act with confidence
Okay, your date certainly knows it’s in a strong position because of the fact that more straight women are looking for love in big cities than men (follow a little). But there are no two like you. And even if these last words seem to come out of a phony book on the best-selling self – confidence in the USA, too bad, it is the strict truth.
Turn the scales upside down, lead the game and assume that it is he who has a hell of a chance to have found an appointment (in the first part of the evening!) With you. Insurance works wonders and above all gives the impression that you don’t have to be there to be happy – one of the most attractive qualities in someone.
You will see, with these tips you will surely find someone who will suit you, who will invest, and who will not get you out of ” I am not ready ” at the first sign of relational involvement.